I'm seeing my dad today for the first time in two years... I think. I don't even remember exactly. It could actually be three years but I am too excited to even stop and do the math.
My daddy is coming for Christmas. I mentioned this to someone yesterday and they asked me if we have a great relationship and I said yes, then paused to assess my answer. That pause brought me in a circle for a good minute but I still arrived at yes.
I am a barrel child, which I believe is self-explanatory. For those who don't know, that means my parents live(d) abroad.
I never actually lived with any of my parents until I was about eight years old. I did that math and I am shocked. I thought I was much older than that when it finally happened. Now I think I have to set aside some time to reflect on that because it would then mean that I have so many memories and experiences before eight. Darn!
Anyhoo, years ago I would not have said that we have a good relationship. I felt like I didn't really know my parents. Sure enough, I spent the holidays with them. If today was class party, aka the last day of school, we were on a flight tomorrow. And from that age, I never liked talking on the phone. So, in retrospect, communication was always a struggle but especially with my dad who mirrored some of my communication patterns.
We were few with words but I would say "I love you" and he said, "you too." I hated that. In the same breath, he never wanted to hang up the phone so he would always wait for anyhow long for me to hang up and we would go back and forth-
I would say "hang up nuh, daddy" and he would ask "then why you don't hang up?" And jokingly asked me if I don't have hangers in my closet.
Holidays with him were fun but more so chill I guess. Honestly, I spent most holidays with my mom. So when I moved back home with both parents, who have been living in two different countries, that was rough for me. With each passing day and month, little Jon was wondering who the hell are these people, lol. 🗣Stranger danger! I had to learn, unlearn and relearn and that was not particularly easy (that's the cute way of putting it).
Needless to say, the relationship between my dad and I was not always great. And even now we have our hiccups but still, I say it is great. In my consciousness, we have grown to understand, forgive and love each other. I say "in my consciousness" because it takes maturity and growth to do so and an understanding an eight, nine, or even a 14-year-old does not have.
All of us living together was a good stint because basically I'm barrelled again.
But now my dad calls me a lot and I don't answer. He then calls my mom, the love of his life, and they both complain to each other about how I don't talk to them. I still don't do phones.
Most times when we talk, he only asks how I am and then says take care and "I love you" or, we each say something about 3 minutes apart until one of us says bye and " I love you."
Other times he is demanding answers about my life plans and reminding me of things I need to do- Like buy a house (I won't mention the most common reminder, lol)
Our calls are still quick exchanges because we still are not talkative over the phone. However, he says "I love you, I love you too/ love you, love you too."
In my younger days, we bonded over tiling, painting, and woodwork- carpentry and mason work. Yes, a girl can help herself around the house. I was the boy before my brother. Now I am a daddy's girl.
"Hi daddy, can I get some money pleaseeeee😌"
"Hi daddy, how would you feel if I get married in 2022?" (Now that's a big joke, lol)
"Daddy, you need to adopt me back as a child because I am considering quitting my job"
Yaaaa. I love my daddy. Fun fact, my birthday is Mach 6 and his is March 7😌.
I just can't wait to smother him! 🥰 I also have a bit of a special welcome. 🤞